Turnings that make Circles.

Allah give me the patience to understand that I have never kept any kind of meaning in your life. Give me the understanding of being degraded and not being treated right. Allah please, give me some hope that I did mean something. Allah please make me realise that there is more than just desperately wanting to get high and drunk most of the time. Allah please love me, because i really need someone to love me. Allah pleasegivemetherighttosuicide. Allah give me the power to separate.I can't be treated like shit anymore.

It's the silence about loneliness that really catches you. It tortures and enhances the truth of being alone. Then the anger comes and you are swept away into some kind of self loathing for a long time. Till someone helps you out and you are back as soon as that someone leaves.  There is something peaceful about the recitation of the Quran. Some kind of hope. And then the realisation that this is all temporary. Cause we are just made of clay. Nothing but a kind of dirt. And the silence lurks back after a short break, resuming its tranquil deafening self. This is me. Care to save me from me?