Turnings that make Circles.

..But for now I will just let you go. Had there been any other option, I would have kept you forever. another life time, you'll be mine.

Some wounds never heal. Or they make the surface epithelium and underneath that facade is still that bleeding. Have you heard of internal bleeding, it shows as a purplish discoloration. Underlying that ecchymosis, is the source of bleed. What if you're dying with a broken heart but no advancements can indicate that. Except the tears that you cry, the thoughts that you think and the empty conversations you have with yourself, imaging it to be with the person you want most; not want, you need the most. I try to find you every now and then, and its usually in vain; not usually, it's in vain in certainty. They were painting the house again, it made me think of the time you first left. To be honest, I miss you. I wish you would just talk to me or say hi. Or just check in. I should know if you are doing okay. I'm usually met with silence. Vast and abysmal silence, on the bright side, it's not every time. I am doing great, you'd be surprised. If we had been together,...

If there was anything I could say to you, it would be, ' please don't go.' It's not because I will miss you as a person. I will miss the times I've had with you. It's scary and sad, all in one. When will I see you again? Will we be the same when I see you? It's time that scares me. We are free today but the next time you come, I might be married and this time won't ever be the same. That freedom, our childish complains, our cat grrrs. I am telling you time will change us, and we wont be the people we knew, when you leave. Bahut ziyada yaad aow gi yaar. Its like ripping off a bandaid, even before the scar healed, so it split asunder ever more. Please. aaj jaanay ki zidd na kero. Do you remember, that one night, when you and I lay on the bed our heads hanging from the end and lying flat on our back. Watching the buildings and the cars change colours. We were listening to chasing cars, and for some odd reason I knew I was going to be okay. Now you are goin...

The conversations in my head are becoming louder; so loud that I want them to be true. I'm getting into old habits. Old habits, new habits. Old habits that have been reburfished make a new habit. In general, old habits are just remodelled into new habits but the old habits are your roots. What happens at the end of this trip? When I get back into my old habits and you move back to where you live. When do I see you again? In another five months? Another year? Can you guarantee anything? What you dont know is when you aregone, i have no body.  I have nobody. And because I love you so much; I only want to wish you well forever. So if there's no tomorrow, remember that there is me. who will love you endlessly to eternity. You; the one who broke my heart. I dont know you would undertsand it better in english, so i will try with something that we both understand. Mai tenu samjhawan ki, na teray baju lagda jee tu ki janay pyaar mera, mai karaan intezar tera Good bye.